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He is aware of the complexities involved, and he recognizes that it’s important for individuals facing serious issues to seek help, if possible, from a pastor or competent Christian counselor.This can provide objectivity, and equip a hurting spouse to prayerfully make decisions based on God’s guidance and the dictates of her own conscience.(NIV, 2011) “If he hates and divorces [his wife],” says the Lord God of Israel, “he covers his garment with injustice,” says the Lord of Hosts.(HCSB, 1999) “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the LORD, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the LORD of hosts.Because every situation is unique, we cannot claim to be in a position to make decisions or judgments for someone in the midst of a marital crisis.Only God can provide the wisdom and direction needed in such circumstances.Where does Focus on the Family stand on abuse and divorce?

Unfortunately, too, many Christians have no choice but to go through a divorce that their spouse filed for. Here is an exercise for our readers: What elements of the typical language of abuser’s allies and crummy counselors can you detect in their email? * * * * * If you’ve never commented on this blog before it is important to read our New Users’ Info page because it gives tips for how to guard your safety while commenting on the blog.

The definition of domestic abuser: a family member or dating partner (current or ex) who has a profound mentality of entitlement to the possession of power and control over the one s/he* chooses to mistreat.

This mentality of entitlement defines the very essence of the abuser.

Based on large number of letters, emails, and phone calls we’ve received on this topic through the years, we’re well aware that abuse of any kind is devastating to victims.

We have nothing but compassion for any wife (or husband, as the case may be) who’s facing such a serious and potentially dangerous problem.

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Obviously, a great deal depends on whether or not the spouse is willing to repent and make a real commitment to change his or her behavior and seek ongoing help and healing.

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